Happy Hour

“Who is getting the next round?” Jimmy asked loudly enough for most of the bar to hear. “I think it is your turn Frank,” he said.

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.” Frank said.

“Hey Charlie, the next round is on Frank.”

“You got it Jimmy,” the bartender answered. O’Dougan’s Pub had been Jimmy’s favorite watering hole for a few years and he had gotten to know Charlie the bartender pretty well. He poured a good drink and was pretty good with the small talk. Jimmy liked him.

It was a pretty typical Friday night in Washington DC. Many of the nine to fivers were eating free appetizers, drinking reduced price drinks and complaining about their jobs. Jimmy and his coworkers were no different. They all worked for a government contractor and there was never a shortage of things to complain about in government work. Six of them had decided to go out for some drinks after work. Jimmy had recommended the pub.

Jimmy Walsh pretty much led your typical, every day, American life. He got up every morning and went to work. Put in the obligatory 10 hour day and, most of the time, ate his microwave dinner watching a mindless program in front of his TV. It had been years since he dated anyone regularly and by all standards, he led a pretty boring life.

Lately he had been working too hard and needed a break. It’s been months since Jimmy was out drinking. He figured he was due a good night's drunk. Might as well be tonight. He was already well on his way anyhow so why not go the final mile. Besides, he could walk the 1000 yards to his crappy one bedroom apartment no matter how drunk he was.

“Let's have some shots,” one of his coworkers said.

“Make mine tequila, Charlie,” Jimmy said.

Two hours, five drinks and four shots of tequila later, Jimmy had reached his objective. He was now drunk. Jimmy knew that he was going to wake up tomorrow morning and regret the last few hours but he didn't care by now. He began to wonder if he would even remember the walk home.

“I got to hit the head,” Jimmy said.

It wasn't until the trip back from the bathroom that he noticed the man at the end of the bar. He was sitting alone, drinking a beer and eating a sandwich. Jimmy thought how nondescript this man really looked. He wasn’t talking with anyone and seemed content to not be noticed. Jimmy couldn’t place it, but something about the man looked familiar.

Jimmy approached him and asked, “Hey mister, do I know you?”

“I don't think so,” said the man.

“Man, you sure look familiar. It could be all the tequila I have had. Maybe we met in Mexico once, huh?”

“I don't think so,” said the man with a smile. “I have never been there and I don't drink tequila.”
“Must be my mistake. Have a good night.” The man nodded and Jimmy headed back to his coworkers. Jimmy was sure he knew the man, but he decided to chalk it up to a drunken mirage and just go back to his drink.

When he got back to his party, he was greeted with another shot of tequila. Jimmy drank it down. He put the shot glass back on the bar and walked directly back over to the man at the end of the bar.

“Look, my coworkers don’t know anything, so you don’t need to involve them.” Jimmy said quietly to the man.

“Excuse me?”

“I am telling you that I am still clean and that they don’t know anything.” Jimmy was starting to slur his words now.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“You don’t have to worry, I am not out of control. Project Gift Package is still a go.”

Charlie had worked his way down to this end of the bar. “Is everything OK mister? Hey Jimmy, maybe it is time to call it a night, huh?”

“Yeah Charlie, maybe you are right. Have a good night.” Jimmy stared into the eyes of the man for a few seconds and then walked away.

“Goodnight Jimmy.” Charlie said.

Jimmy waved his hand in the air without turning around. He walked to the front door and headed home without saying goodbye to his coworkers.

“Sorry, mister. Jimmy is a good guy, but when he has too much to drink, he starts to say some crazy stuff. I hope he didn’t bother you to much.”

“No, no, he was fine. Do you mind if I get my check?” replied the man.

“Coming right up.”

The man paid his check, put on his coat and headed out of the bar. As he hit the street he pulled out his cell phone and pressed speed dial number one.

“Yeah, it's me. The rumor is true. Subject 14 seems to have some memories.”

“No, I don’t think termination is required. He seems to only remember under extreme intoxicated conditions.”

“Yes sir, we will continue to watch him.”

“Yes sir, I am aware how important he is to the project. I understand the security risks, but I think we can control the situation.”

“I will terminate should it become necessary, sir.” He hung up his phone.

An Attempt To Heal

Do you ever wonder if you past will come back to haunt you? I don’t. My past haunts me every single day. Some choices occupy my mind and eat away at my soul. Choices which have prevented me from getting a good night’s sleep in over ten years. Choices which led to self destructive behavior, and failed relationships. Choices which caused me to build a wall around my heart and never let anyone in. Choices I made which led to me leaving you.

Believe me when I say that I am not looking for sympathy, or forgiveness for that matter. I have just recently realized that I can no longer hide from the pain of my past. I can no longer hide from the guilt of leaving you the way and when I did. I can no longer hide from the regret of knowing that I met my soul mate and walked away. In an effort to face my mistakes, I decided to try and contact you. I have wanted to contact you so many times in the past and never followed through. I am not even sure I have the courage to send this letter. Not that this is very courageous. This is the coward’s way out, but then again I chose the coward’s way many times when it came to us, so why should this be different.

I want you to know that I have thought about you almost every day of my life for longer than I can remember. I have searched for an email address for you many times. I searched for a phone number just so I could call you. I wasn’t sure what I would say if I did. “Hi, this is the asshole who screwed up so many years ago, how are you?” I even sat outside your parent’s house one day for about two hours hoping to catch a glimpse of you. I was on a business trip to Houston alone and drove to their new home. I parked in a lot down the street and waited. I am not sure what I would have done if I had seen you. I am not sure what I really expect now.

I know this is beginning to sound like stalking, but I have lived with a feeling of regret for so long. Every once in a while I have to try and resolve it.

I ran across your wedding announcement on the Internet. I always assumed you would be married, but somehow actually knowing you were, broke my heart. You may not believe this, but I hope that you are happy. I hope that your life has been wonderful. I hope you have not lived the life of “what ifs” that I have lived.

You may have forgotten about me years ago. You may curse me everyday. You may never think about me at all. Any of these reactions are understandable. You may never wonder what would be if we had made a different decision somewhere along the road. I do. I wonder what my life would have been like if I had made one different choice. I know that I should not live in the past, but that choice has defined my life and maybe yours. It is the one defining moment in my life that I wish I could take back.

I am sorry if this letter has brought up some painful memories for you. But, I can’t go on avoiding my mistakes nor can I continue to live as I have for the last ten years. I can’t ignore these issues any longer.

I am not sure if you want to contact me or not, but I would like to hear from you. I would like to hear about your life. I would like to know that you are happy. I wouldn't mind if you just told me I was a son of a bitch and never contact you again. I have set up an email box just for you. Feel free to send me anything, even a hate letter. I am really not expecting much to come from this, but I needed to try and heal this open wound somehow and this was the most unobtrusive solution I could come up with.

Blue944

Through The Glass

I stared into my glass of bourbon trying to see my future. A future, I hoped, was brighter than my past. A future that didn’t involve pain and heartache. A future that didn’t make me want to jump in front of the subway train every day. A future I wanted to live in.

Staring into my glass, I couldn’t see my future, all I could see was my past. A past I had spent the last few months trying to escape. Running from my mistakes, trying to forget my stupidity. The most important thing in my life walked out the door three months ago. Funny, I hadn’t realized how important she was before today. Before the 90 days before today. Before the day she left. If I had, then maybe I wouldn’t be alone in a bar, staring into a glass of bourbon, trying to find a reason to get up and go on with my life.

I suddenly realized that I had been sitting, motionless for a long time. The awkwardness of the moment struck me and I looked around the bar. It wasn’t that crowded and I was sure that most of the people had noticed that I had just been sitting there with a glazed look on my face. I didn’t know these people, so I wasn’t that worried about what they thought of the strange man, sitting at the end of the bar, staring into his glass. Besides, this was the kind of bar where people came to forget their past.

I looked up and caught my reflection in the mirror. My reflection looked back at me with a sad, disapproving look. He wasn’t sad because of what I had lost. He was sad because of what I had become. Sad because he was forced to watch me waste away in self pity. Sad because he knew I was drowning in my past. Sad because he knew that I still had a future full of surprises and happiness that I was refusing to see.

As he stared at me and I stared back at him, for the first time, I realized that my life was not behind me. My life was in front of me. I realized that my future was not tied to my past. And I knew that I wasn’t going to find my future in this glass of bourbon. My future was out there, outside this bar.

I pushed the glass of bourbon away and got up. Threw some money on the bar and walked toward the front door. As I approached the end of the bar, I glanced into to the mirror. My reflection was smiling. The kind of satisfied smile you get when you know a friend has turned a corner. Knowing that, in that moment, their life has forever changed. Nodding my head, I smiled back.

Innocent Eyes

Once he saw life with innocent eyes
That is how he looked at the world
He couldn’t see the pain around him
He was too young to comprehend heartache
He was too young to experience loneliness
He was too young to know disappointment
The world was still a beautiful place
When he saw it through innocent eyes

He no longer sees life with innocent eyes
They have been replaced with life’s pain
Instead he leads a life of desperation
Desperate to get back to the life he once knew
A life filled with true companionship
A life consumed with unquestioned love
A life cloaked with the familiar
The life only visible with innocent eyes

Friday Night Delight - FF #6

It was just my typical Friday night, alone, people watching at my local tavern. The bar was more crowded than usual, but that just added to my viewing pleasure. I glanced toward the door as it opened and I saw her enter. A beautiful brunette with smoldering eyes and a confident walk. She came in, slowly looking to her right and left, and I could tell she was sizing up the crowd. She was looking very sexy and it was obvious that she spent quite some time preparing for her Friday night. I imagined her thinking, how am I going to get paid for all my efforts tonight. Can’t put this kind of work into getting ready and not get something out of it. Maybe some free drinks, maybe a great kiss, maybe more, who knows. The night was young and she looked ready for action.

She hadn’t noticed me, which was not unusual as I tend to meld into the scenery. That was alright with me as I generally preferred watching the game and not playing it. I wondered who she would choose? Would she approach him? Or would she attract her prey? These questions were running through my head, when she suddenly looked right at me. Our eyes locked and time froze. The stare lasted forever but somehow didn’t feel uncomfortable. She walked directly over to me, never looking away, holding the mesmerizing gaze between us.

“Hi. Wanna buy me a drink?”
“Sure.”

Oh, it’s on.

---

Flash Fiction as always provided by the kind people over at www.diminishedfifth.blogspot.com those people of course being one mister grimace.
Rules are as always: 250 words
Theme: compensation
Phrase for the week: came in slowly

You and Me

You are my shield, my comfort,
but not my love.
Without you there is great sadness,
with you the sadness is less.
You push the loneliness and pain of the dark away,
but in my heart always it remains.
You are there for me, as I am for you,
but we are not the right ones.
You are my lover,
but you are not.
You take and I take,
because neither can give.
I use you and you use me,
is this right or wrong?
I do not know,
do you?
Can anybody really say they do not use,
not even in the slightest way?
You are safe, and I am safe,
we will end the way we began,
Friends.

A Conversation Before History - Flash Fiction #5

The two astronauts make their way to the flight simulator. It is just another day of training, preparing for the day that they might get their chance to make history. Today, the power of time is beginning to wear on the normal NASA optimism.

"You know Neil, Kennedy promised in ‘62 that we would do it before the end of the decade."

"Yeah, so what is your point Buzz?"

"Well it is 1968 and so far we haven’t done anything except put a man in orbit. Hell, we did that in ‘61. We are no closer to the moon than we were seven years ago."

"Sure we are. Next month we will send Apollo 8 to the moon and back."

"You know as well as I do that if anything else goes wrong, we won’t make it to the moon on time. Maybe we just don’t have the power to send a man to the moon. With all due respect, what was Kennedy thinking?"

"Maybe he was thinking that we need to do get there before those commie Russians do. I don’t know, but I am glad he decided this was the American priority, aren’t you?"

"Yeah, what a ride, huh."

The journey to fulfill the dream of a nation was coming to an end. In eight months time, these two men would walk on the moon. They would be the final proof that man’s ingenuity and desire was powerful enough to make any dream a reality.

---

This week's Flash Fiction challenge:
1. Maximum length: 250 words.
2. The theme is: power
3. The time is: 1968
4. Within the story, you must use this text: all due respect.

Make sure to link back to Diminished Fifth's site.